Guys , let me tell you...talk about the best and the worst of
experiences...
I was hurrying out of work today , a few minutes ahead of my
usual self , and i beat a path downstairs to the train platform.
It's a block long , this platform , and I'm zippin half - way to my far
-end destination , when I notice this shockingly beautiful and
extremely well endowed black gal sitting on the bench . So
pretty was she , that I stopped dead in my tracks and turned to
casually peer down the tunnel for the train , just to get a full -
faced view of her .. Modelishly built , except for this over
-abundant chest wrapped in a tube - top , she had wire rimmed
glasses on , and semi-gherri-curled hair pulled back and up...
black spandex pants , heels... A vision ...
And then she hiccupped.
It was the most unexpected , most deliciously loud , and most
convulsive hiccup I had heard in ages... from this fashionplate
female ! My hand jumped to my recorder , and before it even
cleared its holster , she hiccupped again. It echoed down the
tunnel. I was dumbfounded. My temples throbbed. Then I saw
the empty seat next to her , and dived into it , clicking on "record"..
She was with a younger girl... her sister , as it turned out . Sis
was about 11 y.o. , and the hiccupper about 24-25 ... The
youngster was yakking away with sis , and every 5 - 8 seconds,
big sister would hiccup ... A train pulled in on the opposite
platform , and the din was incredible , but even with that (and my
eyes glued to her face ) , I could still hear , and beautifully watch
her hiccup . She took definite notice of my watching her , and
kept talking with her sister , seemingly undisturbed by her attack.
I had to jump in ... I'd have been arrested for ogling , otherwise ; I
was totally absorbed. So I did .
'" Been waiting here long ? '", I asked stupidly.
" Nope" , she said , " We just got here" .
No hiccup.
" A few minutes? " , I raised my voice to cut thru the trains din.
" More or less.." she smiled . A big , pearly-toothed , open -
mouthed smile. " HIC ! " (omg) , " I have the hiccups", she said ,
onshaken by the outburst that made her breasts almost jump
from her top. I was reaching a rolling boil at that point.
" Are you a model , or an actress , by any chance? " , I asked ,
lamely .
"No *hic* , I'm a chef ... I cook *hic* " . She grinned. And then
hiccupped again . Sis kept talking to her. Just then , our train
came barreling into the station ( I swear , the loudest train I've
ever heard or had put up with ) , and i barely heard a hiccup or
two as they stood to get onboard. I followed them in , in a trance,
and they took a corner 2 -seater . I stood at the connecting door ,
facing them .
" So where are you a chef ? ", I asked , still holding the recorder
right in my hand .
" I'm a chef *HIC* at NYU Cooking School .. I * HICC* graduated ,
and they offered me the job coo*hic* king there . So I took it ".
" Nice " , I said , grinning. 'That's my neighborhood " .
" You live in the *hic* Village? "
"Yep" . She seemed interested . All I could do was grin and take
her all in . She was so indifferent to these phenomenal hiccups
of hers . Her sister started asking her if the next stop was theirs ,
and she said it was , and hiccupped twice in a row , so hard that
that tube top nearly snapped like an old rubberband . I knew I
was going to lose her any minute , and had to do something .
"Maybe I could invite you out to a nice dinner you wont have to
prepare some time soon? "
" Huh ? *HIC* " she said.
" Dinner . .. Soon ... " I repeated, and in the same breath , found
myself unconsciously pressing one of my business cards into
her hand.
" Oh *hic* O.K. ... " , she chirped , grabbing sis' hand and moving
to the doors . " I'll call you." *HIC* . I was glowing.
Outside the doors , she turned around, and yelled , " My name is
Evel *HICC* yn !!! "
"Evelyn !! Got it ! "
" *HIC* Bye !"
"Bye !!!" , as I waved like a hummingbirds wing in action.
I sat down , flabbergasted . I recalled the recorder in my hand,
and smiled even bigger. I clicked play , and sat back to replay the
last 5 minutes of heaven I'd been through. It was full of train
noise , and other sounds, and then stopped as she'd initially
said " "No *hic* , I'm a chef ... I cook..."
The recorder flashed " FULL " at me . That was all I'd gotten of it.
The best and the worst of experiences... Oh , well...that ole
gifthorse ...